Fast Forwarding 2017 :)

It's Black Saturday 2018 and I'm alone. Not that I dread it but I planned this me-time to write something in here.... Been thinking about putting up a post for a week now and I finally and literally helped myself to make my fingers type. Today, we planned to have some out-of-town picnic and celebration for my friends in the current company; that is to celebrate Jeff's birthday and sorta farewell for Alvin. We had fun playing in the waters of Sungai Sedim, a river somewhere in Kulim, Malaysia.While all of us are enjoying the nature, I was particularly kinda meditating while gazing at the strong current of flowing waters and the rocks in between. The scenery gave me a revelation of Psalms 18:2, "The Lord is my rock, and my fortress, and my deliverer; my God, my strength, in whom I will trust; my buckler, and the horn of my salvation, and my high tower."

So much for the present and lemme begin what's related to the title of this entry :P Thought I'd give a quick run through of my 2017 so that I have something to read in the future when I turn on my "reminiscin'" mode...

2017 - A year that I will never forget. A year full of blessings, fulfillment of dreams, and lotsa prayers answered by God. I'm in awe and more than thankful.

Tomorrow will commence the 1st year of my "best April Fool's day" ever. Last year April 1 was when my dear "now-husband" finally popped the question asking me to marry him. I already had the idea back then when he was still planning it all because I recognized some clues, nevertheless, I played along and planned to act "surprised". Don't say I'm a "kill-joy" but in fairness, we have been discussing about "it" for quite some time so I'd say the element of surprise wasn't there anymore. Somehow, it turned out to be as surprising as it can be. While I knew it's gonna happen and knew who were the people involved, there was a twist in the situation that totally made me real surprised instead. He made a very touching AVP of me and of us and invited my long old friends into the rented venue. That truly gave me a real surprise that I ended up crying like a baby. Cries of genuine happiness. I consider his proposal as a milestone and one of the many important moments of my life and I wanted to have with me all my closest friends and love ones. Well, it just so happen that my family is back home, hence they couldn't be in the celebration. And so I said yes! :)

Obviously the next step would be the planning, which is I'd say "challenging" for anyone who'd do especially for people like me, like us, who are very sentimental. Within April, we've decided on a date, hence, the planning started abruptly. It's gonna be in September! What makes it extra-interesting is guess what? In May, I had to travel to US for a business trip and I'd be away for about 3 weeks! Well it's basically more of attending a conference in Florida in which I am going to receive an award from my current company. I'm thankful for the award and I deserve it. It's fascinating as well that I get to bring 1 guest with me for the trip, all expense paid! Isn't that awesome? I brought my dear sister with me and that US trip gave us some time to bond, love and hate each other...lol... you know sisters or siblings would have some cats and dogs fight mode on. Nevertheless, I treasured the moments. Cecelia and I had the chance to meet up and spend some time with our Uncle in Jacksonville; she had the chance to meet up with her friend Ana. I made a side trip to our Englewood Colorado office while Ces took the opportunity to rest. We also both had the chance to spend quality time with Tito Eddie, Tita Claire and cousins Kristel & her boyfriend Mark and some time with Kate before she got married.We also met up with Ryan Potpot and Kuya JunJun & family. Our trip to US was really in a good timing and we were able to meet up many relatives and somehow joined special celebrations like Tita Claire's birthday, Kate's bridal shower and some baby shower of their family friend. It was unforgettable and I'm more than thankful to God for the awesome wonderful blessings and opportunity.

June, July, August passed by so swiftly and occupied my time to the max! Most of the days were spent wisely ofcourse you know where right? Planning our wedding. We wanted our wedding to be in the Philippines since our respective families are there and we are from there. Discussions about the place, the entourage list, managing the black and white requirements for a marriage certificate, and what not were done. We invited very close friends here in Penang and we are so grateful that most of them said "yes, we are coming"; and then they booked their own flights and hotels in which we are glad to know! :) In fact, they even booked their flights earlier than us, talk about being too excited for us huh! :P Well, just to let you know, I did hire a wedding planner but I am telling you, even though you do so, as the "bride", I would say you'll end up making sure everything is perfectly planned. I'm thankful to have my sisters, Tin & Ces and bestfriend Lorna to help me coordinate, etc. from Manila. On the sides, we were going through the Pre-marital counselling with Pastor GP and we finished it by end of June. At the same time, we were practicing some dance, which we want to perform as a surprise for our guests, to the tune of "Footloose" :P

September 2nd was the wedding day! We went back to Manila a week earlier to do what other preparations that we needed to do. Our guests from Penang arrived on the "Thursday" of that week, the wedding was on a Saturday. It was held in Tagaytay. We checked in a very nice "small- homey" hotel and that's where we have requested our Penang Guests to check in also. It was in Carmelence Lodge and Carmelence View. There's a nice view of the Taal Lake, the rooms are wonderful. Just google it and you'll be able to browser their website. The usual "wedding" escapades were done, video shoot, photoshoot, etc.

We planned a garden wedding but the weather was having its tantrums so we ended up making it indoor. The indoor venue was a rustic-type and my wedding gown was like a victorian style so I thought that's a match. Well, we did all the things that a couple would usually do on their wedding - Philippines style ya.... However, we have prepared something extra-ordinary and special for that night. The special final dance and fireworks as finale. We requested all married couples to go out of the garden and to join us in our last dance for the night to the tune of "Love moves in a mysterious ways", Nina version. In the end, we surprised everyone with fireworks. We wanted to share our "cloud 9" moment with all married couples present and wished to re-spark their love with each other through the dance and the fireworks! The wives were soo happy that some of them uttered that they've been married for 20 years or more but were never danced by their husbands ever! And so all of us "wives" were smiling away! It was magical, not just for us but for all the couples! Mission accomplished.

Here's the link to our SDE that you wanna check out: https://vimeo.com/232420728

Well, October, November and December were more of things that a new couple would do. I'll leave this an open-ended area to let you think; besides, this entry is too long already. I have to cut it and write my ending paragraph! :P

Now, it's 2018. Lots of things still. But I wanna end with having the Lord Jesus Christ in mind. I couldn't be more than thankful for what he did on the cross to save me, all of us from our sins! In one and a half hours time, it's gonna be Easter!

Have a blessed Easter 2018!

-end-
3186

1st ECG Experience

It's been a while.

So many things have happened for the past what, more than 1.5 years since my last blog entry. Yeah, I was too occupied with what's going on with my life and Imma say, I had no time and no mood really to write. It's not because I don't want too but it's just that, it looked like time flies like mad lately that I can't even find time to do this. Or perhaps, blogging has become a lesser priority? I dunno...

Recently, a friend from Oregon visited Penang again after 5years. Well, it took him 5years to get some approvals for his business trip here again. We met up together with my person and shared snapshots of our respective stories for the past 5years. I got to know that he's an avid reader of this blog and somehow deep inside, I was delighted to know. So, yeah.... you can say that this blog entry is to give him something new to read! :P

So anyways, for the past couple of months, I have been experiencing some chest pains and perhaps sort of difficulty in breathing. It's intermittent and I am not really sure why. Hence, I decided to have it checked in a nearby clinic. They checked my BP and it was 93/63, pulse rate and heart beat were normal. It's a good thing that the clinic has some basic facilities and the doctor on duty had me go through what they call ECG.

And so I had my very first ECG experience.

Overall, it was okay and not really a biggie. They would just plugin some strobes somewhere in your chest on the left side where the heart is supposedly located. Results came out good and I thought that was a big relief. LOL...The doctor even said that my breathing was normal and she didn't hear any issue upon using the stethoscope to check it.

In the end, I was given some medication for muscle relaxant and breathlessness to take and the doctor advised me to relax and be kind to myself. Apparently, the chest pains etc. might be caused by anxiety and/or stress. It puzzled me a little since in my opinion I don't think I'm having such things though.

Be kind to myself. Hmmm... that made me think..it made me think how to be kind to myself. I went home and gave myself a break after taking the 2 tablets of medicine. I dived into bed and prayed and talk to God about what's going on. Lately, I have been lazy doing this and perhaps this is a wake-up call to once again commune with the lover of my soul.

The pain was gone for a little but came back again in a span of 12 hours. Oh well, it's still puzzling me that I wanted to find Dr. House and have me diagnosed haha! Okay, enough already I am thinking too much again.

Kidding aside, I just hope and pray that whatever this is, it will be gone!

Hi Tim! :D

Bye for now.

-end-
3129

My 2015 Mantra

I just parted ways with my family and love one from Discovery Suites, from our "staycation" - they're goin home, I'm meetin up some friends. Walked my way 'til megamall and as expected, a test of patience for waiting for the "late comers" ;-)

Wendy's is still at the same place in there and I thought of having my classic faves - bacon mushroom melt & what else? Frosty!!! As I sat in a corner, started my burger & ice cream, I got hooked up in the net, yay! 

Multitasking nature turned on - I was eating, browsing, looking at passerby people, goofing with a kid at the other side of the glass wall and then suddenly stopped. I paused and thought, hmmm..what will be my 2015 focus? Initially, I thought about just keep on loving the people who love me back, focus my time, my attention, my everything to them; stop wasting time and energy of even just thinking to those who ignore me or just perhaps choose to cross me out in their lives. After all, the greatest thing you'll ever learn is to love AND be loved in return - from Moulin Rouge movie, remember? As I continue contemplating on the thought, Someone knocked my head and heart off and reminded me of something...

"If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that?"

I gulped and almost wanted to argue but eventually folded. Freed up the first thought and chose to listen to that whispered reminder...

My mind started to accumulate as many people in my life, in my thoughts... those who love me, those who hate me, those who are just so so/ neutral to me and even those who don't know me. I reminisced moments, the good and the bad, as fast and as many as I can. Smiled and uttered a simple prayer and hope for all and concluded my 2015 mantra:

Don't stop loving, don't stop caring; even to those who won't and who couldn't love and care for me back.

Love, love, love! 

Why? Because God is love! :)

-end- 2946

out of the blue

We arrived LCCT airport on time. After getting the baggage, both of us dropped by a duty free store to check out the price of Bailey's when we come across the chocolates area. I left him there to roam around more then I head back to where mama is waiting for us.

When he came out from the store, he handed me over a bag with two boxes of Lindt dark chocolates. One was the same as the first chocolate he gave me, thin squares of Lindt dark chocolate and the other was in a heart-shaped container.

It was out the blue and ofcourse unexpected. I smiled.

We had more time to roam around LCCT airport because our next flight will be in another 5hours time. I accompanied my mother to an area where we can sit comfortably and just do anything that we can do to kill time while he disappeared. He said he'll just walk around and check out some shops in the airport, sort of a window shopping.

When he returned to where we were chillin', he handed over a couple of small dark-chocolate toblerone.... yes, chocolates again! I smiled and was glad deep inside. He knew before I wanted to have that kind of chocolate. I saw once like more than a week ago but it was too big and pricey. When he saw the opportunity of the smaller size's availability, he grabbed it, gave it to me.

Out of the blue, my heart smiled.

Out of the blue, he made me smile.

Out of the blue, I've wished it's gonna be always like this.

Out of the blue, everything seems gonna be bright!


-2790

Post 35: Fear Not~!

The funny thing about life here on earth is, that while most of us (for instance, myself) have received that blessed assurance from the hope of all hearts (ask me how & who), still this human nature stuff is being a pain in the *toooooot*, I meant pain in the neck! LOL!

Few days post my 35th year, these variety of fear crept the 'heavens' out of me. Hybrid type of the good and the bad ones that gave me a pinch of paralysis all over - this I must admit. Yes, I'm still human and fear is no stranger to myself too.

Call it a wonderful birthday present, I recently accepted a new role at work that triggered everything. I was grateful, happy and excited because this role is something related to one of the things that I really like or love to do - that is what I dub as, to take care of people although in the corporate realm, they call it people manager. However, the fall back is that I suddenly felt fear and started to think of many things such as how am I gonna manage it, how am I gonna do it, etcetera, etcetera. On top of that, all these "authentic" rumors about manpower reduction because of the changes and transformation about to take place aggregated my dilemma. As those fears roam around within me, this another fear under my "personal life" catalogue emerged. I consider this area as a core of my being so this fear is really freaking me out.  

Now here are the nice part of this blog :) 

While I was murmuring silently and getting myself together praying for refuge from the Lord, the topic we discussed in our life group was about fear and overcoming it. I smiled and sighed a relief. The bible verses we've shared and discussed about, lifted up myself and my spirit then voila, those fear started to get drowned and gone with the wind. Below are some:

Joshua 1:9 - "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go."

1 John 4:18 - There is not fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. 

The undisputed Psalms 23 - this is considered an all time favorite of the many.

Truly, the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to the dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. (Hebrews 4:13).

Even Facebook's "God wants you know" apps gave me an insight of encouragement regarding fear that helped me to swim across its ocean. Is it funny or just timing or maybe God is doing something about it to speak to me?

And when we had a combined meeting within my current org yesterday, the big boss shared quotes about "change" that are rather encouraging and enchanting.

At night, a dear friend dated me to have some post celebration... although part of it was, me using her escape goat to buy that Phiten necklace for her boyfriend's birthday. I realize.... I really appreciate this kind of simple things, the strolling, mall-ing, plus tidbits of chitchat, and of course the eating. These somehow helped me get passed of thinking those destructive fears in me.

With the dilemma of fear vs. all of the above weapons, I'm once again ready to face fear and conquer it with victory! Hence my mantra is....

FEAR NOT!

-2740

at thirty five...

I am not in-denial of my age but it's just that, I still can't believe I'm already thirty five years old... boooya! LOL! What's the big deal? :P Main reason I would say is that all those past memories since I was a kid from primary days, to high school life, college days, until now....are still vivid in me that I could re-tell the associated stories in a detailed manner!

Oh well... it's been four days since I officially and biologically turned 35; It's Saturday anyway and I can't procrastinate no more longer, hence, I kicked the butt of my fingers, electrocuted my brain, and pound my heart to make sure I'd get this birthday blog moving, soooo... here I am.

At thirty five, I said I want to reflect about things I have accomplished in the past until now but instead, I thought about things like what's gonna happen in the future, what else can I do, should I do, or can still accomplish... of course not by myself and own will alone.. but with God by my side.

At thirty five, I don't want to brag that I'm wiser but instead, I want to recognize myself for having additional experiences in life that makes me wonder more and explore more like a child. Despite of the noticeable variance in emotions and physical notions, which is more on the passive side (I'm kinda disappointed to myself that I'm starting not to be active, physically!), my mind is cautiously tougher and eager.

At thirty five, it has come to my attention that I still have a lot of things to learn and to re-learn. It might sound quite unusual to others but for me, it is something that I thought is necessary as well. I need to learn not to care too much about things and other people so as not to end up spoon-feeding them and many more possible not helpful or not good outcomes (or over spoon-feeding I'd say) and that they can learn on their own too or giving all ending up nothing left for my own self tending to be burned out and just tear apart out of the blue. Come to think of it, everything that is too much is really not good huh?! I need to re-learn some of the basics as well so as things won't go complicated and more confusing, and there's the so-called "many to mention".

At thirty five, I can somehow describe how is the feeling when you have been to both sides of a certain situation (of course not at the same time okay!). Stuff like for example, being in a situation where there's a "nice-guy-friend" in your life that you came to a point of misinterpreting it as if he likes you and he is basically in love with the other girl, and then suddenly you're that girl whom the guy is in-love with and he was a "nice-guy-friend" to another girl who misinterpreted it she thought he likes her. Another one would be, you were so poor before that you have nothing to eat at all and now food just rots in your fridge because it's just too much or way more than you can have; instance like you were a loner then suddenly you're surrounded with people and "friends" and then you're back having just "few" true friends and a whole lot more examples! Oopps don't get me wrong, those were just examples, don't have to be connected or related to me okay! For illustration purposes, lol. Suddenly I remember the song "Both Sides Now" (Joni Mitchell's version ya!) and of course non other than Paul. In Philippians 4:12, he wrote, "I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want."

At thirty five, I'm neither happy nor sad. Instead, I'm hopeful and joyful. It's true that as humans, we tend to be either sad or happy. Being sad or happy is contributed by the circumstances happening in our lives, by the things around us, may it be material or other stuff, or by the people around us whether we love them or not. However, having hope and joy deep inside? They only point us towards a one, The One! our dear Lord Jesus Christ! On my actual 35th birthday, there were things that could have been contributed to me being sad and in tears; happy and in all smiles; but the joy and hope I have deep inside my heart ended me both in tears and smiles both in a good positive way.

At thirty five, I'm just at peace. Our peace is not in the absence of troubles but in the presence of Jesus Christ. That leads me to saying I am complete, I am complete with the presence of the lover of my soul in my heart. I am complete in Jesus Christ. I am not perfect and still have flaws, funny thing is that there's a possibility that some flaws have just grown up but I know for sure that God is still not finished with me still...Yes, not yet... no... not until I literally depart from this fallen world and go home to heaven! :P



-2706-

The Inevitable~!

I just finished watching John Lloyd & Bea's "One More Chance" movie again. Upon watching it for the second time, it made me realize that there's one very thing that is inevitable to happen - to get hurt.

There are things that even though we say we do not want to do to hurt other people, still, it is inevitable and will possibly bound to happen.

I began to think about it really hard. Yeah, I've been drastically hurt like around 6 years ago.

I was totally wrecked and even to the point of literally not being able to breathe because of the pain when I got hurt. But then again, looking back, I'm glad that I'm able to fully smile today and say... hey, it wasn't that bad after all.

I survived the wreckage. I'm still right here, able to stand up, enjoy and live life to the fullest - knowing that I have God with me all the time.

Indeed, pain is inevitable and part of reality (even God himself experienced all kinds of pain, I must say).

However, at the same time, it helps you to grow and be more mature, and it will be an open door for you to realize that there are more goodness in life ahead of you. So...

Cheer. Up. Look. Up. Life. Is. Good.

:)