Monday, June 29, 2009

When things become a "norm"...

I was taken a back for a while when I received a forwarded text message this morning that contains the verse of Job 9:10, which says "He does great things too marvelous to understand".

It was a good reminder for me. I was convicted to have had read that verse as I realize I was operating in the "norm" of it already. It is the norm of knowing that He is indeed constantly doing great things too marvelous to understand, that is why it was quite a bit no big deal for me anymore - this is sooo not really good. You may ask, how can I say that. Here's a simple true-to-life example of an experience. There are mornings that when I walk on the way to the taxi-bay, I'd see birds around, hearing their chirping and then I'd normally run to them to chase them like a kid as they fly away. Then, i'll smile and enjoy their chirping, as i look into the sky following my gaze at them, hopping and jumping. Recently, yeah I still notice them but since it was like the norm already, the feeling is quite neutral already but ofcourse recognizing what God is sayin'.

I then remembered once, one of Pastor Sam's preaching that "familiarity" will somehow rub you from experiencing miracle from the Lord. I guess that's one of at least the "cons" of being familiar with something and/or with someone huh! Then I asked myself, is it really the case? :(((((( it's quite disgusting because the "leaping of the heart" isn't that high anymore but then the good part I guess is that.. it's embedded within me already. While is that so, I guess I shouldn't be complacent about it and must be proactively and cautiously into it! Anyhow, I guess just a head's up to everyone though... God's deed of great things doesn't have to be in favor of you or me okay.... and I'd say it won't always make you "happy" :P so beware! lol...

Apparently, while is that so.... I came to realize as I am typing this... that I am missing God so much... I dunno how or why but yeah... I miss Him dearly soooo much!

Familiarity somehow covered what I really feel from the very deepest part of me - the wanting and missing and loving Him so very much! What an irony!

Well, I gotta wrap this up and position myself to uncover what I feel flushing out familiarity and rediscovering the same Him in a new way!

Tata!

Saturday, June 27, 2009

The plant in a corner...

I just got back from watching the blockbuster "Transformer 2" with a bunch of awesome friends, but my mind was still in that plant at one corner in Nando's (a chicken resto here in Penang) instead of the movie itself - weird.

As I have taken note Optimus Prime's ending punchline: "With good memories, we live on!" (or something like that... I can't remember the exact wordings though ;P), my thoughts switched back to the above title.

Well, I decided to go to Queensbay say about 3hrs before the agreed meet-up dinner time. I'd thought to chill in Coffee Bean over a regular Latte first while starting a new book, which entitled "Strengths Finder".

Thirty minutes before the dinner time, I purposely went to Nando's to at least do an early reservation of a table for seventeen - now that's really called "a bunch!" :) The manager asked me to sit down in one table nearby the resto's entrance for a while and so my reading continues. I'm not sure why and how come... little I know, I turned to my right and saw a simple plant, which is located at the very corner. I stopped, keenly stared at the plant and after a while, I began to notice a beautifully-landscaped plant emersing at my sight.

I smiled.

I've recalled that there was a time, I know a girl who was just like that plant... someone mentioned that she was just around the corner, unnoticed but eventually some beauty emerged in her, which made that someone saw her. Quoting the person, "I was once blind but now I see". While is that so, something not so good happened afterwards (at least in the human's nature arena).

But just as what Optimus Prime said, I am sure that this girl will always cherish that good moment forgetting the not so good at all and then, live on! =)

At the moment, she is in that corner once again. She's living on - waiting and anticipating yet a new beholder that will not give up on the beauty gazed and choose to stay forever - just as the hope and promise instilled deep within her heart.

The plant in a corner.

Friday, June 12, 2009

unusual morning... sigh!

This morning...I woke up realizing that tears flowing down my whole face, wandering about the question: why is it more painful when the one you love is the one hurting you? And somehow, there's a cloud of heaviness within my heart that is slowly being released as I cry out silently while cuddling in bed.

As tears continuosly flowing down my cheeks, my heart is somehow taking hold of God accompanying my sighing with words of prayer unto Him. I can't imagine myself without JC by my side... I wonder how God can do it when all of us whom He loves and majority are like walking away, hurting Him? I'm pretty sure He's hurt badly the way we do too since we are made in His image. But...nah.. He has done it all and won the victory...and me? I'm not God... that's why I need Him all the time.

Anyhow...at first, I thought it was just because of one good friend (or should I say used to be good friend?) who's been acting so weird lately that I asked myself why in the world I'm so offended in most of the person's gestures? It's a bit odd because when I think about other friends, it's a different of a scenario :S Anyhow, this situation is actually something not new to me anymore. Perhaps, the interval of time that lapsed makes me a little bit obnoxious that I tended to react this way. Errrr... crying is one good outlet Imma say.. but..yeah crying it out to someone is better... good thing I have that constant someone with me all the time :P

Well, I guess there's really nothing constant in this world except "change" and we just have to bear and deal with it - ofcourse not by our own might and own strength but by His Spirit and His Power.

I began to think about other things and other people as well as my day moves along. One way or another, there are a lot of people out there who may feel sadness, loneliness and a various kind of struggles and challenges... and the likes. After all, I'm not alone in that arena. Perhaps, I may have a little bit of edge or difference from the most - I have this someone's peace that surpasses all understanding, ultimate joy, & big-time hope of eternity .

For it is said, those who sow in tears will reap songs with joy!

Now, I gotta get ready to visit the "grannies" somewhere here in Penang.....