God spoke thru pontianaks!

"I will do everything I can to take care of you." - These were the words of Edward Cullens to Bella when they were in the car, as Edward was driving her back (or something, can't really remember). These were the same words echoed in my heart this morning after I felt God's touch and comfort.

Something quite normal (as the majority say) happened this morning "again", which somehow spoiled my enthusiasm praising and worshipping God. At the beginning of worship, I felt really very odd to do so. But then I'm reminded that worshipping God is not about me, it's about Him! From the bottom of my heart, I really wanted to but the shallow part of it didn't really jived. As the song "Magnificent" was sung, I purposely raised my hand and sang along from my heart as I wanna hear from Him. While in my mind, I talked to God and I said..."Lord, why is it that I feel...You seem so far from me "now"? Nevertheless, I will still choose to praise and worship you."

I was thinking, was it because the "yet another parking challenge" that kinda ruined my day? Nah, I don't think so. Probably what happened triggered other "stuffs" within and made me bursted out implicitly.

Suddenly, I felt an embrace from Siew Ching. I was like in tears as I felt her hugging me. She has never done that before in the middle of worship though. Then I thought of Him and deep within, it's like I can hear God saying.. "there you go! you think I'm far from you? I just hugged you!" Then the above "one-liner" registered my mind together with a few scenes in the "Twilight" movie we've watched last night, side by side with the few scenes of my life.

The scene whereby daddy Cullen said to the daughter, "She's with Edward and she's part of the family now. We will protect her." flashed unto me. I can feel Bella's fear but she stood firm knowing that her "family" with Edward's is there for her.

... then the vast instances that my "family" here had helped me, took care of me, were played unto me. Talk about what happened last Wednesday night and this morning, I have so much of my brothers and sisters in Christ who were there encouraging me in the middle of my "trembling and shaking individuality." I'm really thankful that i wanted to hug each and everyone of them (but cannot.. LOL) :P

Talk about "everything" in the first sentence of this entry, God is using other people around me as well to take care of me that on top of my church family, friends outside church are also there. Truly God can do "everything"... Simple things... small things... count a LOT for me. This is why, on my own little way... may it be from the most simple thing I can, to the most complicated "wowser" big stuff I'm capable of, I will do it.

"Twilight" is sort of a love story...errr not really sort of Imma say.. it is indeed a love story. LOL. I admit, I was thinking of other things too while watching the movie ;p ehehehe... Hey c'mon! let's admit (for those who have watched it), it's a "feel-good" movie okay? :P Just like what Bella felt with Edward, she's loving him unconditionally... i asked myself.. can i do that? Then I told myself, I want and I love to do that, God help me - to love unconditionally. Then another thought came, "will there be a man like Edward who will like really care for me like that?" I'm sure a lot of girls who've watched the movie thought of the same thing. I can tell, LOL. and so forth and so on!

However, it's funny how God twisted my thoughts back to Him.

I'm glad. I'm amazed. I'm in awe. Indescribable.